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My First Blog Post

There are so many thoughts whirling around in this pretty little mind of mine!

I woke up in a garden, located amongst the clouds… As time went on, like crops springing from the ground; children began to form all throughout the garden.

Without a care we continued to lay there in love… Until the whole garden was full of children…

(Urban Garden: A Twin Flame Story)-

Aisha J. Washington

This is the first post on my new blog. I’m just getting this new blog going, so stay tuned for more. Subscribe below to get notified when I post new updates.

Black History Month: Let’s not forget!

With the news of the Pending Trump impeachment determination…

The news of Kobe Bryant and GiGi Bryant’s untimely death and all of the emotions that followed and still plague us. This amongst a number of other recent tragedies and concerns to include but not limited to: Talks of pending WW3… Doom… Gloom… and then we as a people… Left to feel subconsciously unnerved, angst and depressed with the lack of good news, amongst all of the news.

I admittedly am the type of person, who once watched the news… Yet, no longer do! Deciding years ago, that the lack of good news was enough of a deterrent from me watching the news… Figuring that anything I needed to know, would be informed to me through conversations at work, with friends or family about anything that is of dire concern.

Which brings me to my next point… There is consequently, no escaping the BAD news that infests the news and media of today… Yet, hearing it second hand takes some of the initial stress from the news and so for those who watch the news and relay to myself and others like me about what are the current happenings… For that, I thank you!

It is February 4th and I literally have not seen NOT one post about black history month… From ANYONE… From No ONE.

This Saddens me deeply. SO… Let me be the first. This article will be to highlight the resilience and strength of modern day African Americans. In the hopes that as a whole we will take this month to remember our history, honor our ancestors and do a little more good this month… As we recall, where we are… Where we’ve been and go forth with optimism about where we are going.

In 2019 All three major US beauty pageant titles were given to Black Women… FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HISTORY!… Miss Teen USA, Miss America and Miss USA.

In Football, Fritz Pollard broke down barriers and became NFL’s first African American Head Coach. There were also a number of firsts that I saw online regarding African Americans making strides in healthcare, education and other career ventures.

Yet! Let us also not forget… 2018-2019’s rise of the Freedom Fighters

Freedom fighters around the globe commemorate July 13 as the day that three Black women helped gave birth to a movement. In the five short years since #Black LivesMatter arrived on the scene — thanks to the creative genius of Patrisse Cullors, Alicia Garza, and Opal Tometti — the push for Black liberation from state-inflicted violence has evolved into one of the most influential social movements of the post-civil rights era. (How Black Lives Matter Changed the Way Americans Fight).

Black Lives Matter has always been more of a human rights movement rather than a civil rights movement. BLM’s focus has been less about changing specific laws and more about fighting for a fundamental reordering of society wherein Black lives are free from systematic dehumanization. Still, the movement’s measurable impact on the political and legal landscape is undeniable. 

I recall the uproar and hashtags that fought against a seemingly positive movement, where some others would post #Alllivesmatter… Completely missing the point, until a young lady who could speak on it as a representative, similar in physical features as those who were outraged by the movement explained it in these terms… “Black Lives Matter, too”… That is all the movement was ever saying, and screaming it loudly in desperation to be heard and felt.

I hope that I will soon see posts about our history, that I usually see each year… I hope that reading the articles and stories and seeing the images of those who made a difference will warm your hearts.

There is a very different life and a very different reality that we could have been in, had it NOT been for every sacrifice that was made. From Martin Luther King Jr. to Harriet Tubman. From Frederick McKinley Jones (Refrigerated truck) to Garrett Morgan (Traffic Light). From Lewis Latimer (Carbon lightbulb creator) to Dr. James E. West (Microphone). To name a few.

My goal was to highlight a few. Well known and no so well known. All being influential in their own right and more than worthy of being remembered.

Then there is you…

A potential influencer, inventor, leader… A possible number one spot for you… The first… The ability to do and be anything that you put your mind too… If you believe in yourself enough to put forth the effort.

Considering the barriers your ancestors before you have faced… And choosing to honor those memories and do more… and be, more… Helping others, loving others and ultimately changing others through your kindness, wisdom and generosity.

I challenge everyone who reads this to look up someone from the past who has sought to achieve or has achieved in your current area of expertise… Your desired area of expertise and.. Push to achieve more than they had.

If you find that no one has… THEN BE THE FIRST.

Peace, Love and be blessed.

Mykonos Greece: A Travelers Guide

Greece, the home of ancient mythology. The home of the titans… The oldest reference of Gods and supreme beings… The catalyst to most of Shakespeare’s work. Not the motherland, which is Africa… Yet, a sister land with vast mountains, beautiful oceans and a culture almost as old as time.

Following Athens, Mykonos is one of the worlds most toured places. Mykonos is a Greek island, part of the Cyclades, lying between Tinos, Syros, Paros and Naxos.

Some of the attractions that tourists want to see on their trip to Mykonos are as follows:

The Mykonos Windmills

The windmills can be seen from every point of the village of Mykonos, the island’s principal village, which is frequently called the Chora (which translates to “Country” in Greek, but refers to an island’s “Town”) on Greek islands. The windmills are the first thing seen when coming into the harbour of Alefkandra, as they stand on a hill overlooking the area. Most windmills face towards the North where the island’s climate sources its strongest winds over the largest part of the year. There are currently 16 windmills on Mykonos of which seven are positioned on the landmark hill in Chora. Most of them were built by the Venetians in the 16th century, but their construction continued into the early 20th century. They were primarily used to mill wheat. They were an important source of income for the inhabitants. Their use gradually declined until they ceased production in the middle of the 20th century. The architecture of each of them is similar, all have a round shape, white colour and a pointed roof and very small windows. Such windmills are found in almost all Cyclades islands. One of these windmills has been transformed into a museum. The whole village of Chora and part of the harbour are visible from this point. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mykonos_windmills)

Other notable places: Fokos Beach, Aegean Maritime Museum, Archeological Museum of Mykonos, Rarity Gallery and Church of Panagia Paraportiani

You don’t have to be rich and you don’t have to be military in order to make travel plans for Mykonos Greece. Below you will see details regarding prices and costs you can expect to pay for flight, stay and fun!

Although traveling to Greece is popular, even more popular than that is to couple trips togethers. For example: Some people want to visit Rome and Mykonos. Some want to visit Athens and Mykonos… Some want to visit Santorini and Athens… I think you got me at this point..

So! From there begins the plans. Would you like to stay one week or two weeks. On average people do not travel and stay at a location any longer than two weeks as we have jobs and a life to come back to… In some circumstances you can stay longer, in those instances you are usually staying with family members who are residing in the country that you will be traveling to.

For most of us the later is not an option and therefore we need… A place to stay during our time in another country.

Cost for hotels, VRBO and Airbnb:

For a 8 day/night stay you can anticipate a cost of around $2,000. For a 14 day stay you can anticipate around a $2,700 stay. In Greece the cost for an Airbnb and a hotel are fairly similar in cost that either option would sit the traveler. If you are traveling with a group larger than two… It may be best to consider a VRBO or an Airbnb.

So what about the flight?

This will largely depend on where from the United States you are traveling from, but in general the average cost would be anywhere from $400 to $700 one way. Sometimes airports will allow you to get a discount when you are flying round trip.

So what about the spending money?

This depends on your spending habits and if you prefer to eat out versus cooking. One thing about Greece is there is an abundance of stores, markets and places to buy fresh produce. The fresh produce can be used (Meat, Starch and veggie) to COOK. You will of course need a stove and if you are in a home you are renting that will be a cost effective strategy to save on your trip.

Then your money can be used to visit different museums and exhibits and learn more about the Greek culture (Which I am hoping was the main point of this excursion in the first place?)

Putting aside at least $300 dollars for eating out a few times to enjoy the Greek cuisine would enhance the experience. Additionally you will have relatives who will expect small trinkets from your trip, to show that you thought of them on your travels.

Tips to enjoy your trip even more…

Stay by your phone… But, stay OFF your phone as much as possible. You will want the comfort of having your phone with you in case you need to make a call, but you also want to enjoy your trip so constantly checking social media and uploading pics will take away from the experience.

Save the photos for the flight back and then do a massive download. Want to save yourself from what most Greeks and Egyptians term as “The Evil/Bad eye?” then it may be best to save the photos for once you are safe at home.

Need to catch up on Greek mythology and myths? I encourage you to check out sites that discuss the Top 20 Greek Myths, the Gods and Goddesses of Greek Mythology and Amulets and symbols of protection.

Author of: Urban Garden-A Twin Flame Story (A.J.Washington)

Psychopathic Love: A necessary EVIL

“would you leap with me?” he asked while staring at me intently… I wasn’t sure what to say as I had been here before… On this ledge, staring over… Uncertain…

Conflicting emotions of love and fear overcame me… With his hand on my back both gently and firm… I wondered would he push me over… He could do so… Very easily, with just three words…

As he opened his mouth to speak to me… To tell me… I knew what he would say…

This would be the end… and the beginning…

“I LOVE YOU”…

The unsaid had now been said… Felt… But never having slipped from his lips… Until now…

His hands now going from my middle back to my shoulder… firmly turning me around… Facing him… “I love you too”… and I do… Waiting for the moment to say what I just thought… “I do”… Do you? or… Is it just love… like you love playing ball… Like you love fishing… Like you love alfredo… Or… Are you IN Love?… I wondered as I stared at him in his eyes.

Please don’t kill me… Don’t hurt me… No, heal me… feel me… Love me… Like you’ve never loved anyone in your whole life…

As he got on one knee… Would you be my wife?…

He wouldn’t allow me to open my mouth with a response before he took out a knife… Running it across his hand before opening my clutched palm and doing the same to mine… Tightly twisting my hand as the blood dripped from my hand to his… Then placing his same wounded hand across his heart.

Faint as blood continued to pour from my hand… He used both hands and with immense force he pushed me… backwards I fell… for what felt like forever… With no ability to turn back…

Arms stretched out toward him as he also leaped after me… Falling…

We were bonded… We were in love… We were happy… Yet there was the fear of… For how long?…Forever was the destination; but most, failed to make it… Both of us competitive… Wanting to win… Realizing that we would never let this die… This love… That we would both fight… Fight for one another and the bond that we formed.

In this knowing, I found comfort… That we would fight… To preserve this love…

As I continued to fall, his voice echoed “I love you” in my thoughts as peace fell over me… Falling… Happily… Falling into a space where fear could not exist… only LOVE.

I opened my eyes… “I said, will you take this leap with me?” He stated before getting on one knee… Frozen, I could not move… Yes!… Yes!, of course, YES!! I screamed in my mind… Yet, my mouth would not move… Heart pounding, palms sweating… Thinking about what was to come… Not knowing, but wanting to hypothesis a happy ending… One made from the same substance as fairy tales… Always having believed that fairy tales can be real… That true love can transform anyone… Can change lives… Can be healing…

Still frozen… “Babe” he questioned and stated as he waited a response… He had pushed me over… At first standing on a hill staring out at the most beautiful view… Our future waiting on the other side of the horizon…

My heart… Swollen from love, happiness and content… “Yes” I whispered… “What babe?”… “Yes”…. “Yesssssss” as tears dropped from my eyes.

Tears of joy… pain… happiness… Happy that he found me worthy of his love… Joy that we would share this life together… Happy… Then pain…

Pain creeping in from the not knowing… The not knowing what will happen… The not knowing if it would ever end… My fault… His fault… Our fault… No longer fighting the good fight and allowing life to win… circumstances to win…

Telling myself that this will NEVER happen, despite a small flicker of doubt. Realizing that if it didn’t work out, it would be the end of me… Temporarily dying and then re-emerging into someone else… Slightly similar to who I was before, but not quite.

I had fallen… In love… Yet before hitting rock bottom I was caught by the security of what we were building and held afloat. There was still nothing there to prevent me from smacking the ground except the security and trust that this union was based on… If that were to deteriorate it would no longer hold me up… No longer keep me in that space of bliss… Of love.

No diagnosis of mental health… Yet I realized that love induced psychosis. A term meaning “Thought and emotions which are so impaired that contact is lost with external reality.

This was us… This was love…

As I lay on a cloud and stare up at the nighttime sky… A cloud that in reality was my bed and the sky being the ceiling in my bedroom… Everything seemed more beautiful and more grandiose as a result of this affliction… This… LOVE.

I pictured the Joker and Harley Quinn, I pictured Bonnie and Clyde… Cleopatra and Marc Anthony. I pictured love that was both dangerous and beautiful. That was worth living for… Dying for… and this… Was us.

Through time the heightened affection and need became obsession. The need to have more of one another and less of reality… The need to hide away from the world, into our own space.

This obsession for one another that was once bliss… irritated a possessive nature in both of us. Jealousy and annoyed thoughts of others who we felt could pose a threat to our union… Blaming one another for the perceived intrusion of others that slowly served as a wedge… Casting us farther and farther apart.

The thin line between love and hate… The veil that covered our eyes that could not be removed. The nagging feeling that we could not escape as we approached an end… Our end.

Humiliation as I felt that I should have seen it coming. Wondering how I could have been so blind… Realizing that we both were … Blind… Deer in headlights… Car fast approaching and unable to move… Admiring the beauty of the lights… Not fearing what was to come, although inevitable.

Recalling moments of feeling at ease, at peace… In love… Resentment as it felt brief before the surge of emotions that were not calm… The greatest love stories, I recalled were birth from not just a place of calm, but a place of fire. Igniting something inside and leaving you changed.

Eyes seeing red… Blood red at the thought of another touching, holding and kissing you… Thoughts of a honorable kill… Then a prayer, to the one who unknowingly intruded on what was mine… Insane… Uncontrollable thoughts… From a person who once was sane…

Psychotic… Love…

Isn’t it amazing that when love ends… Your heart sometimes “literally” feels broken… Beyond repair… It seems hard for people to understand your pain… Even if they had once loved… It wasn’t your love… It wasn’t this love… And so, they couldn’t understand… Not the extent of your anguish… Although, they may want to.

Then after heightened words… Curses… The attempt to understand your pain and for you to understand mine… The wanting to be on the same page… Saying the same thing but not understanding clearly what is being said…

Finding a common ground amongst the fear… Joining back together in a relationship… a cup, once broken and now mended… The cracks still in the frame which could easily cause for it to break again…

Praying that we could prevent from throwing stones… We would not be able to get a new cup… This was our cup… Sometimes half empty, sometimes half full… Sometimes overflowing.

This was our love story… This is every love story… psychotic…

LOVE…

What it is really like to travel to EGYPT

Marsa Matrouh

Have you ever wanted to travel to Egypt?

If you have stumbled across this site, then you probably are curious about what it is really like to visit Egypt. This may be one of your dream destinations and I can tell you that it is worth visiting, at least once in your lifetime.

So what is it like? There are the pyramids, the white sand, the beautiful beaches, the hookahs, the loud music, the people… Sometimes friendly, sometimes not so much and then there is the food!

Shawarma, lamb, rice, falafel, Arabic sweets, Fiteer, Bechamel and much, much MORE!

It is common to walk down the streets of Whatever part of Egypt that you are visiting and be bombarded by smells coming from all directions… Food, drinks and laughter.

One way to get a great experience with the locals is to be a part of the main stream action… This will require you to learn at least some Arabic… Yet, do not be discouraged! Arabic, is not as hard a language to learn as it might seem. There are some common themes in Arabic that will help you to at least do the basics, such as ordering food, beverages and asking where is the hamam (Bathroom).

It is important to know that Egyptian Arabic is a different dialect than is spoken in some neighboring countries… So being specific in learning Egyptian Arabic, is best.

You are probably wondering about the most important aspect of them all…. How can you fund this trip and how much does it cost!… Excellent question and since you asked… It is not cheap… Yet, it is well worth it.

For about a thousand dollars you can fly to Egypt... Round trip! Sometimes it is more depending on the time of the year. Believe it or not, Egypt also gets cold so peak season is during the summer when it is warmer and people can enjoy their beautiful beaches.

With the new wave being Airbnb's, Egypt has also taken hold of this trend and offers a wide variety of housing options for your stay. Cost for a two week trip range from around $600 to well over $2000.

What about the places to visit… If you are a native from Egypt, you know of all the many options and places to go… Including places to shop. Yet, if you are not… You may want a guide on what places should be visited to make the most of your trip.

Heres the scoop!

Most people want to see the pyramids… Those are located in Cairo, along with many shops and restaurants and the Nile river. The Nile also stretches through a large part of Egypt so finding a place to sit and have dinner along the Nile, is easy once you are there for a brief stay.

Aside from the pyramids of Giza, there are the temples and monuments in Luxor Egypt.

To visit the pyramids of Giza you are looking at $40. Which is not bad at all. Keep in mind that the American dollar is worth much more in Egypt. Whenever I travel to Egypt, I only take with me $2,000 to be safe and end up coming back with almost half of that!

The cost of your trip can be cut down a lot if you learn some Arabic. If you are not good with learning new languages, don’t fret! For $2,400 or less you can get a hotel/ Airbnb, get a cruise along the Nile River and a tour guide for all of your excursions. This cost is per person and this estimate is based on being in Egypt for a total of 8 days and 7 nights.

So what about the people?

I would be lying to you if I said that Egypt has calm, happy people who are welcoming to tourists and travelers… In fact, of all the times I have been there; I can tell you that having visitors seems to be odd to most Egyptians… Especially if you are not on the tourist path and just out in main stream Egyptian society, as I was.

The first time I went was right before the January 25th, 2011 revolution… At a time when the tension was brewing with unhappy citizens who wanted their president at the time Hosni Mubarak; out of office!

It was pretty scary and I recall trying my best to not speak English in public and blend in as much as possible. Lucky for me, I can pass for Egyptian and often went unnoticed amongst the natives… Except when I spoke Arabic and my accent gave me away!

I was also with my ex, who is from Alexandria, Egypt… He was able to do most of the talking and ensure that there was nothing to be concerned about… I recall talks about how his auntie Alice could not visit during this time… She is polish with blonde hair and a fair complexion… There was fear that she could be disrespected, ridiculed or even kidnapped if she were to go during the looming days before the 2011 revolution… When I went again in 2015, Alice was present and all was well…

I say all of that to say... That it is best to also pay attention to what is going on in Egyptian society at the time you are considering visiting.

The goal after all, is to go… Enjoy your time… Annnnnnnnnnd, RETURN!

If your goal is sandy beaches, good music, happy people and great food! Then you may want to consider Sharm El Sheik Egypt! This is a resort town between the Red Sea and the Sinai Peninsula.

If I were to put together a dream vacation for anyone it would be to visit Luxor and then visit Sharm El Sheik all in one trip! A couple of days in Luxor and the remainder of the week in Sharm! You will then get the best of both worlds… Site seeing and warm, white sanded see through beaches.

A less expensive alternative to Egypt would be Tunisia. Tunisia is a North African country bordering the Mediterranean sea and the Sahara Desert. Currently Tunisia may not be the safest bet. When you stumble across this blog, please check the news and date before booking. This was made in 2020 and during a time when terrorist attacks in that region are at an all time high.

When there are no threats of attach... There are still the occasions where you may be asked to sell your beautiful daughter for three donkeys and an Arabian horse... This really happened to my step mother and step sister when they visited Tunisia with my dad... Luckily he was there and did not find this attempt at bargaining funny and was sure to keep my step mom and step sister close by him the remainder of the trip!

When you are visiting an unfamiliar place, whether Egypt or New Zealand! Please, be sure to not travel alone… Take someone with you, even if you are just going to get a sip of water… Again the goal is to have fun, to be safe annnnnnnnnd to RETURN!

Looming Apocalypse: Why you shouldn’t give a DAMN!

Rumors of war! Fires spreading triumphantly across lands all over the world! A White House, that seems to be more like a sitcom made from hell and then… US… Powerlessly watching while things fall to Shit.

Excuse my language, but that; is to me… The reality of the times we are living in.

If you are sitting on your couch or bed, tirelessly watching the news and feeling anxious over the fact that the news… Never seems to be good news… STOP.

Turn off the worry and turn on a little bit if F*ck it and here’s why:

Unless there is something that you can do to change it… There is nothing you can do to change it…

I stopped watching the news a long time ago… It is not that I don’t care about what is happening around the world… It is not that I don’t care about my country… It is not that I don’t want to be up to date on all that is happening… Because I do stay current… By word of mouth!

I’m not concerned about misinterpretations because I speak to several people about current happenings. I cannot tell you how much I appreciate the secondary trauma that people are willing to endure by watching death, fire, impeachment drama and discussions of pending World War III!… Then relaying the information to me.

And Trauma… Is exactly what it is!

All of us as humans have these built in defense mechanisms that help us to navigate life, keep us safe and with the overall goal to keep us alive.

Our brains are wired to remember things that could cause a threat in any form and stores these cues for a later date. The response that is evoked by these cues that are stored is what leads to anxiety, depression and various other mental health concerns.

So what are you saying???

I am saying that constant exposure to bad shit… evokes a traumatic response to your body… Putting you in a constant state of angst and preventing you from living the happy life that we all deserve to live.

When people see the things that are happening all around the world… They are forced to question how this will effect them… How this will effect their family… Then as a natural defense, wanting to protect… You begin to feel defeated because you instinctually want to be able to do something to ensure your safety and survival and the safety and survival of those you love.

Here is why you should not worry: Asking these simple questions.

1. Can I change anything?

2. Can I do anything?

3. Can I help in any way?

If the answer is yes to any of these questions, then by all means do what you can… and solicit the help of others who can also make a difference. (Me included). This can be in the form of support groups for family members of people who are sent overseas. This can be counsel for those who are veterans suffering with mental health needs who for whatever reasons are not connected to therapy services.

Mental Health is how I earn my living five days a week. I then write for pleasure. I would absolutely love to help in ANY capacity with any endeavor that would benefit those who need help.

My hope is that we all feel the same… That we recognize our limitations and do what we can… Then leave it to God.

If you do not believe in God… Maybe you should consider developing a relationship with God while there is still time. (I am not forcing anything on anyone) I totally get the trends regarding us being one with the universe… Us being Gods and Godesses ourselves… And oh, what a beautiful notion.

Those who are advanced on their spiritual journey will tell you that instead, we are linked to God/Source. Made in God’s image. Connected to the same consciousness. With differing variations of the same divine being taught all throughout the world.

Us also being divine… As we are connected to the divine.

I am not going to preach about that… Will save it for another blog and another day!

In the end, whether we get blown to smithereens or continue to live to enjoy another day… I hope that you do just that.. ENJOY, another day.

Signs that you are generating a trauma response: Constant worrying, lack of sleep, decreased appetite, bouts of anger, sadness or withdrawal. Withdrawal from others, from activities, from family and friends… Thoughts of harming self or others. Fear of what your day will hold.

Keep reading… For support…

For supportive resources, Please scroll down further

If you or someone you know is suicidal, please contact 1800-273-8255 (National Suicide Prevention Hotline)

If you feel depressed and are not sure what to do about it… Please do not keep this to yourself. Contact your local CSB (Community Services Board) to seek help.

The truth of the matter is, that we all sometimes become sad… It is the chronic sadness that is life altering and effects not just us, but everyone around us.

Chin up* Better days are coming! I believe that…

I want you to believe it also.

Penny Pinching Pauly!!!

Hey there!

If you have come across this page, well… lucky you!

In this blog you will learn some tips to make fast cash part time… Essentially working smarter not harder! Earning you fast cash.. paying off debt… saving and investing.

Doing all of this, by simply doing what you love!

Last year for fun I wrote a book (Urban Garden: A Twin Flame Story) Found on Amazon/Kindle.

After having several people tell me how much they enjoyed it, I sought to get it published and it has been doing extremely well ever since.

So in my endeavors to try and promote myself and market my book (as I self published) taking out the middle man and allowing me to keep most of the book profit… That would also mean that I would not have a big name company marketing for me… I would need to do it myself.

This was probably the best decision I could have ever made and I will share why…

Profits from pennies…

Pennies add up… Dollars add up… Get me?

You may not want to spend a lot of time collecting pennies and you don’t have to. You simply just need a plan that can work in your favor.

So after writing my book… I found several people in my inbox asking me to write their books for them… Most people have a story to tell, but simply do not like writing… Well, I ended up making a part time income from doing just that.

My love for writing allowed me to be able to make a profit from writing for others. Earning $100 an hour, which in comparison may seem like chump change for some ghost writers… But guess what!?… It’s a very welcomed start.

So instead of taking that money and blowing it on food, clothes, shoes or any frivolous things that would not earn me an additional profit… I invested in myself with all the money earned.

I saved most, but also used some to further promote my book. I paid money for an annual membership on WordPress so that I could write blogs to share my story, promote my book and my ghost writing business.

I began gaining attention from those who are in media… Being asked to interview about my book and experience in the mental health field… Please note that before I began being sought out… I was doing the seeking!

I would go online and look up different media outlets. I asked friends to share my business page to their list of friends. Facebooks new feature that was launched in 2019 helps tremendously, as friends and family can go to your page… Scroll to the right, press community, then press “Invite friends”… It will then invite all of their friends, to YOUR page!… Pretty awesome right?

I thought so too!

This allowed my following to increase by the thousands. Then I continued to promote my book and services as a ghost writer… Averaging about two clients a week. Some long standing as it takes time to write a well written book.

Then… guess what? When you do an awesome job… People talk about it… People share their experience with you and ultimately, others come flocking to see how you can be of assistance to them.

I am not asking you to become a ghost writer…. I enjoy doing it, that is why I do it well… It is my passion.

I am saying that this is an example of how to take a small thought and build it into an empire!

For me it started with the love of writing… Then a story that I felt worthy of sharing… publishing it… Having others want help to write and publish… Then vwahlah! I was in business… Literally!

In a matter of two months I was getting steady part time work that was earning me almost as much as I earn at my full time job! and I can tell you that profits will only be increasing from here!

It starts with an idea… A dream… A goal… Then fueled by the willingness to do whatever it takes to accomplish it!

Proactive Parenting

Parenting Proactively

Being a parent is not easy and it is not meant to be easy, however there ARE things that you can do to ensure that it will get easier with time.

In order to do this… You have to ask what is the desired outcome of this parenting experience?

What do you want to get out of it and what do you want your children to get out of it?

Once you have identified that, then it is just a matter of techniques put into place to help ensure that this occurs.

The truth of the matter is, that those adorable little babies that you birthed will not stay adorable forever!… They will go through stages. Passing through being a toddler, being a teen and then being the various stages that are ultimately the adult life.

The goal should always be to raise strong and successful adults. What that means and what that will look like, will depend on each family and each parent.

For some that is financial success… For some that is your children becoming helpful parts of society… For some that is simply survival… Ensuring that your children know how to survive. For the latter, that brings me great sadness but for some that is the reality.

Despite your position, this article will prove helpful. Take whatever from it that you need!

The Three P’s:

* Protect * Praise * Provide

Protect: Children are vulnerable little people who look to us for safety as a means of their own survival. Children need to feel not just loved, but protected, daily.

So what does this protection look like: The short answer is just showing a conscious effort to ensure their safe in all settings around the clock…

This includes being conscious of whose care you leave your children in. Being selective is always best!

Your children’s lives and well-being can depend on it…

Working in the mental health field, I can tell you that child abuse occurs far to often and 90% of the time by people that parents trusted to watch and protect their child.

Be extra selective and listen to your children when they say that someone makes them feel uncomfortable or unsafe.

When you are at the store, ensure that you have them secured in a cart that you are pushing… or holding their hand. This shows that you care to keep them close and protected… If your child should venture too far from you while out, then inform them of why it is important to stay close… Warning them of the dangers that can sometimes be present while out in public (an unfortunate reality).

When you are home, keeping them from hot stoves or ovens, sharp items etc. Telling them why these type of things are dangerous and being sure to say things like “I don’t want you to get hurt”… “I don’t want anything happening to you” or other similar comments that allows the child to feel valued and protected by you.

When it comes to others… This is especially important.

Children need time to get to know others and build rapport with them. This is ok! Do not expect your child to automatically know someone. Do not allow your children to be in uncomfortable circumstances. Do not allow them to sit on the laps of adults.. Unless they are adults that you know and trust personally. (Even still this is questionable, but coming from a person who works in the mental health field and having been exposed to more cases then I would like to admit of sexual abuse… Most being trusted family and friends who have abused children) I find it best to never do this and to not allow your children to be alone with anyone who is not, again a trusted adult!

Listening to your children and being in tune with them. Sometimes it is just about being present and listening.

This is the best way to ensure your child feels not just loved but protected! … You must realize that children are constantly thinking and processing things. Learning their environment and how people interact with one another… They will be faced with uncomfortable circumstances at times from others that may make them feel rejected, hurt or sad. They need to know that YOU are their safe place…

How can you ensure that they know that you are their safe place?

One way is by simply being present and being an active listener… When I pick my girls up from school and daycare, I never turn on the radio… At least for the first 20 minutes of them being in the car… More often than not, I do not turn it on at all…

Why is that?

I NEED to know what happened in their day. Everything that they would like to share and I prompt them so that I can understand all the details of their day. (This will only work for children who can speak) For children who cannot their are other avenues of learning your child’s day, which will serve for another very detailed article.

When my girls get in the car… I ask “How was your day?”… Yet, I do not allow them to stop with “fine” or “ok”… I follow up with “What was your favorite part of the day?”… I give them my undivided attention. I do not answer calls or respond to messages (you shouldn’t be doing this while driving anyway)…

Most importantly; I listen and I encourage them to continue with what they are telling me, prompting for more. I do this by saying things like “What else?” or if they are telling me about a particular person I probe regarding that person.

This will help me do several things!

1. My child knows I care about her day… Translating to her that I also care about her. 2. I will learn of possible things that could be of concern or find relief that my child is not currently faced with any threats to their physical or emotional well-being. 3. Most importantly! This will build a pattern and learned behavior for your child… Your child will get in the habit of telling you all about their day.. The good, the bad and all in between. This will eventually serve as a great way to avert peer pressure and other challenges that your child(ren) will face.

Praise: Being sure to inform your child of the things that they do that are noticed, appreciated and that you are happy about… There really is magic in this phrase “I am proud of you”… I cannot tell you how far that one sentence will go with a child, who feels that there parent is proud of them.

Praising your child’s good behaviors and accomplishments will do many things: build self-esteem, confidence and make them want to continue to get that response from you daily… This is what you want… For them to want to do the right thing and for you to recognize it.

The response of you being proud. This is also known as positive reinforcement. It does not have to be with money, candy, toys or any other thing that kids will grow accustom to (that will become costly)… Simple praise for the good that is done (good report card grades, cleaning the room, being polite) etc. Goes a long way!!!

Here is another key factor:… Do this in front of others.

For example: If you are at a family gathering and someone mentions something that will give an opportunity to praise your child… Do it! especially if your child is listening… This solidifies how you feel and reinforces them wanting to do good in all settings.

I cannot tell you how many times I have people tell me how well behaved, kind, smart and funny my kids are. Surprised about their big personalities and confidence at such young ages… (Especially my oldest) as I’ve invested the most time in her at this point. My youngest is two and she is flourishing in the same ways and gaining her personality.

My thought is that… My kids are only going to feel comfortable to be their best selves… The best versions of who they are, if I encourage and promote them to do so!

I am their biggest fans and they have no doubt in their minds about that, as I remind them every chance I get!

Provide: My favorite theory has to be Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. Maslow details how in general people are only able to focus on one step at a time.

If you are struggling to keep a roof over your head, naturally you are not able to focus on your well-being or anyone’s well-being outside of that… As at that time the most important thing… is survival.

Sometimes we get caught up in providing… Providing a home, providing food, providing financially… that we forget that there are other components to promote a persons well- being.

Mental well-being and spiritual well-being.

No matter the situation… try to incorporate the three P’s whenever you can. As often as you can… and know that your best is good enough!

Protect. Praise. Provide

Home wreckers EXPOSED!!!

Photo credits to the author of: Urban Garden-A Twin Flame Story

Aisha Washington

How dare she come into my home and disturb the peace that I had built for so many years, I thought.

Life as the center of attention, felt beautiful. There was bliss… There was happiness… and there was no question that my needs would be met, as I was the only one.

The day that she came home with a baby in her arms… My whole world turned upside down. “can you take it back”… I asked her in a calm and innocent voice… With wide eyes she just looked at me and said… “No, she is your little sister”.

What is this… This person that my mother calls “my sister”… How did this come to be and why!?

I had seen my mother’s belly growing, but my small toddler brain could not comprehend how my whole life would soon change.

The lack of sleep I would have to endure. The questioning as to if I would still be loved by my parents in the same capacity that they had previously loved me… Now having to share their attention and love with someone else… A baby… A sister!

When Rakia was born I did not know how much I would soon fall in love with her. The same way that my parents had. I could not have fathomed how over protective I would be over her… Then as life went on, that I would not be able to imagine life without her.

My parents named her “Rakia Elon” meaning “precious jewel”… There were days that she acted far from precious, but never steering far from her title as the “jewel”. Growing into a strong, hard working and assertive young lady, that I am proud to know.

Homewrecker #2

When I was ten years old, another little homewrecker was born! My father and step mother named her Shayla. Shayla meaning “from the fairy palace” or “question” if referring to the biblical meaning.

At that point, I did not feel as slighted as I had felt having to adjust to a newborn and just being a toddler at the time. Now I was a big girl! and doted over my little sister as if she was my own.

I enjoyed doing her hair and found humor in her attempts to imitate things that I would do. When I became a teen and began to wear mascara and other beauty enhancers, Shayla would find her way into my hair and beauty supplies and dress up as she saw me do.

Siblings can sometimes seem like they are intruding on the world that you knew before them… When in reality, without them life simply would not be the same.

I am the oldest of six children total!

My father and step mother often joke about wanting to have ten children… Well, I think they are no longer able to bare children… and thankfully, because what some parents fail to realize, is that the oldest often also becomes a parent.

A secondary parent… One that holds no financial responsibility, but is looked up to and held at high regard.

My siblings know that they can come to me about anything!… And as we have gotten older, they also are a peaceful place of solace in times of need.

I NEVER have to question it… They are always there when I need them and for that I am blessed.

Is everything always sugar and spice and everything nice?… Absolutely not!

There are times when I would like to string my sisters up by their feet to the nearest tree and whoop their asses!… I am sure that they feel the same about me… That’s sibling life.

Yet one thing that will not change is the love that we have for one another.

The having each other’s backs when times get tough.

My sisters may fight with me and get on my last nerve… trust me they have pressed every button! and one’s that I also had no clue, even existed!!!

But, I would never tell them anything wrong and I would never intentionally hurt them.

Eventually and unfortunately my parents will grow old… One day they will even leave us to journey on to greener pastures in the sky…

I find comfort in knowing that despite this… I have my siblings.

For those of you who have siblings… Cherish this bond.

They may make you angry… They may drive you to want to pluck every hair from your head.. or theirs!

Do not allow trivial disputes to impede on the fact that you are siblings… and this is a bond not just made by blood, but made in the connection that you share.

To my sisters: Victoria, Rakia and Shayla… I love you to the moon and beyond!

The Spiritual Being in the Physical Experience

What if I told you that you are a spirit living a physical existence and not the other way around. That the true nature of who you are is a spirit… A soul. Would you believe me?

If you are struggling to say yes to this question, let’s consider some facts.

There is this thing called Universal Consciousness. A collection of thoughts that we are all a part of. A knowing… An enlightenment.

Some of us choose to tap into it and some of us do not. When you are a spiritual being living in the world, you are surrounded by things that you are taught through society, through relationships, through religion and through your upbringing.

These things can sometimes cloud the true nature of what life on earth is supposed to be like. Causing undo stress from roles we feel we are supposed to play daily.

Now, I’m not telling you to run off and become a hippie and live amongst nature… Although nature also, is a part of who we are in spirit; due to all living things having a soul and consciousness.

In the Quran there is a story about ants. I love referencing the Quran, because unlike the bible (I am Christian) but have read the Bible and Quran in their entirety. So unlike the bible the Quran references our connection with nature. It discusses at length finding beauty around you at all times and appreciating it.

The story of the ants describes a worker ant telling the rest of the ant tribe to enter their homes, so not to be crushed by Solomon’s army while they walked through. The ant hearing Solomon’s army approach closer, feared that all the other ants who had not had time to go underground would be crushed, and began to pray to God.

God hearing the ant’s plea, spoke to Solomon asking that he halt his army. Solomon hearing God’s cue, stopped until God encouraged him to go forth.

“Subhan Allah” is a term that God encourages us to use when we are in appreciation of his beautiful work. Again, I am a Christian but have been blessed to have read the Quran as an attempt to understand God better and to become closer to him in this journey we call life.

When you see dusk turn to dawn, a full moon overhead, the ocean or any other beautiful art that God has created, you are encouraged to say “Subhan Allah” in order to show appreciation for how he created this life and all it’s beauty.

This saying literally means “Glory be to God”.

Many spiritual people know and understand the power of other living things, such as trees. Trees being a huge source of oxygen and the main reason why we are able to breathe!

The Bible references trees in all their splendor. Other cultures such as the kabbalist’s recognize the fifteenth of the month of Aquarius, the day known as “Tu B’Shevat” the birthday of the trees.

Now, what about humans!?… Well if you have not read my blog “The Human Avatar: What Religion Doesn’t want you to know” yet… I strongly encourage you to. It gives what I would call lesson one to what I am about to describe.

Our soul’s can do many things… Use our body as vehicles to go through this life. This life being the physical experience and our soul’s being the driver. The soul being on the mission and our body being the tool used to accomplish the mission.

Still with me?

If so! There’s more…

Our souls have the ability to come and go from our bodies, and they do so when they please. The most common time being when we are sleeping. They have the ability to travel for a brief stay in heaven, until it is time to return to us.

Other times that the soul leaves us is when their is a scare of death or near death experience.

We all know the story about Christ and how he was crucified on the cross? Well, did you know that Jesus’s soul was not present during the crucifixion? God being the almighty that he is, raised Jesus’s soul from his body so that he would not endure the crucifixion.

Soul travel… As we are not our bodies… We are our soul’s.

It was 2001 and I was standing outside of the apartment building that I lived in, when a man with a gun began shooting. Fortunate for me, the guy was not shooting at me, but instead at the guy who was standing beside me.

None the less this was a terrifying experience…

I feared for my life as bullets flew by me in all directions, barely grazing me as something even more terrifying then that occurred!

For a brief moment everything went black… I had not been shot, but as a response to this fear that I would die, I left… My body.

This is what I believe happened to me as I don’t recall seeing anything for several seconds and was only broken out of this moment when someone came and caught me before I fell to the ground (fainted).

I did not remember those few seconds of bullets going by, after the initial threat. I did not see the guy standing behind me who had begun running.

I did not feel my self going faint… All I saw was everything go black and then moments later being returned to my normal state… Looking behind me, seeing the guy with the gun chasing the guy who was standing beside me down the street… At this point, almost a block away!

I frantically ran inside to try and collect my bearings… Sitting on the couch in an attempt to try and make sense of what others were telling me… That I began to faint, almost hitting the ground.

Psychologist’s will tell you that this phenomena was (fight, flight or freeze) and that my response was that of fear which caused me to freeze…

I took psychology in school, gaining a bachelors degree in it and this was not what that was! It was literally an out of body experience where my soul had briefly left me to prevent the shock of feeling the blunt force of bullets.

I would later in life experience other similar experiences with my soul leaving me, but these were pleasant and only in the presence of my twin. (That’s for a whole other story) and if interested you can find it on Amazon/Kindle (Urban Garden: A Twin Flame Story).

Are you still following?

If so, Great!

So what of Ghost’s and paranormal experiences?… Many people have had experiences with coming into contact with a ghost before. That image of a person that you can see out of the corner of your eye, then “poof” their gone!…

Well, that is a spirit… A soul… Not attached to a body.

Even more intriguing than that! Is the fact that our soul’s have this “knowing”. Some call it intuition, some call it psychic connection… In reality it is that and much more!

Deja Vu’ being one of those things that our soul’s are able to do. As soul’s do not know time. They know our stories as they are written and the path that we are supposed to be on (although we have free will). Our soul’s like to send us little cues when we are in the right place at the right time.

“I’ve seen this before!”… If this has happened to you. Congratulations, you are in tune with your soul.

Found on Amazon/ Kindle

So how will knowing this benefit me?

Well, since you asked…

* Try to start becoming more in tune with your true self (your soul).

* Meditation helps… Prayer helps… Not to mention it gets us closer to God (source).

Let your soul take the lead… You are your soul… You are not your body… Listen to your intuition (It is the voice of your soul). Follow it… It is the divine part of you… The part of you that is connected to others, to nature, to God.

  • Once you have become in tune with your true self… Things start to fall into place. Many call this your “divine purpose”… I challenge you… To get to know the real you!

Soul

For Feet’s Sake!

Photo by Ben Hartley on Unsplash

Who knew that simply having feet could land you hundreds of dollars? I wasn’t aware of this fact until just recently when I was sent a message on Facebook asking for photos of my feet!

It was a well thought out message and I could tell that the young man had been doing this awhile. It read something like “Send me pictures of your feet. I will pay $260. Half up front and the remainder once the feet pictures are sent.”

Baffled by this, I felt indifferent. It was right around the holidays and man could I use the money! However, something just did not sit well with me about this. There were so many questions.

What would he be doing with my feet? Why feet? Why me?

I read the message a few times before responding… “$260?” to which he responded “Yes, half up front”. I shrugged before screen shotting my cashapp name and sending it to him! I waited for him to send half up front. While also messaging my friends frantically asking what I should do.

He says he wants pictures of my feet… but currently polish is chipping on most of them and they just aren’t up to par to be sending to anyone… Also, they still were my feet and I was just unsure!

I began to feel Defeeted… Yes I intentionally did that pun on words, before one of my friends agreed to send me photos of her well manicured feet to send to the fellow.

I was back in business! Agreeing to pay her half of the $260 because, heck… They were not really going to be my feet, but I was the one with the offer.

Not even checking to see if he had sent half, I begin to send him numerous feet pics. Then a GIF of a woman with her hand out as if asking for money.

He saw the messages… and then said something even more bizarre than him wanting feet pics.

“Wait, wait, wait… I wanted to model my feet in the position that I wanted you to take the feet pics”… Excuse me?… So, not only do you want feet pics, which at this point felt like sending nudes; but you also want to specify the way in which I position the feet for these pics?!

Stomach turning at the thought of having to witness him modeling his crusty feet in positions that he wanted me to model my own before snapping angles and sending the feet pics his way… Made it feel not worth it.

Again feeling Defeeted I respond with “Ok, $200”. At this point he already had the feet… I just wanted something for them. He read the message and did not respond.

I again sent him the cashapp information… which he read and did not respond.

Angry I messaged and said… “Guess your not willing to pay, I’m glad I didn’t really send MY feet”.

I then see (…) three dots as if he was typing… What happened to the guy who pulled a disappearing act on me after receiving the feet?…”You scammed me” he replies. It was at that moment that I realized that this whole feet business, was a serious thing!

I became caddy “Why feet?” I asked. “I just have a fetish for feet” he responded… Before spewing curse words and calling me everything but a child of God!… For having sent feet that did not belong to me. I then sent a laughing face emoji and responded “Have a good day”.

For me the issue was not so much the fetish as we all have some quirks… Some stranger than others! My issue was the business like way that he went about it, while also being unprofessional.

If you are soliciting my feet for services… Whatever purposes you will be using them for… I expect that you will be a man of your word and pay half up front.

To have the audacity to call me a “scammer” for sending feet that did not belong to me… Yet having not held up his end of the bargain, by paying half up front… Was simply bad business.

Sadly he still had some feet… Some well manicured feet… Not my feet, but still… One’s that he could stare at and use for his own desires and for the effort to find these foot… I Should have been compensated!

(I laugh as I type this whole blog) yet admit that I still feel slighted.

Ladies, if you have one foot… two feet… three… those feet can land you some part time income!

I have learned that it is important to be sure that your feet are displayed at the right angles… Make sure that it is cool in the room where the photos will be taken, so that the feet do not begin to sweat. The lighting should be somewhat dim… But not too dim!

Perhaps wear a sock, but roll it down half way. Leave a little for the imagination, for God’s sake!

Do not agree to send your whole foot! until half is paid up front.

Then… last but not least! If you plan to go into the business of modeling and selling your feet, be sure to use your actual feet.

You wouldn’t want to step on anyone’s toes, by doing otherwise!